Who to blame???

another question pops into my head..

so much for listening...

started to wonder why things happen in  such a way, sometime it just baffles me.


WE all face problems day to day, ever wondered where it started from..

i Assume i have the answer for it, but please dont get dissapointed with it.

WE complain, and we blame either ourselves or others for whatever mistakes that happens.
Yes it is true that somebody made the mistake, but is that somebody totally to be blamed for
everything?
i think not.

the trigger factor will not be as visible as everyone thinks, it just comes around to that specific
person by some chain of communication. This thing applies to every aspects of our lives even our country..

one little imperfection, causes another imperfection.. then it grows and grows and grows..

let have an example here...

say, selmolina, has some works to do, and has its designated datelines...
and before anything , she was being hitten with severe misfortunes,
well which for others might look like she's just giving some lame old excuses.
but, well the real stuff...
will baffle everyone, as how one minor thing thats unrelated will cause some great effect.
but this doesnt mean that WE can go on blaming others..

look at it this way,
everyone around contributed something to that problem..
without realising...

ANOTHER MUCH CLEARER EXAMPLE, AS THE PREVIOUS IS  VAGUE..

lets take married couples,

they one day started a huge arguement...
well.. why?
it started from their miscommunication due to intepreting each other wrongly,
then decide to console to their friends, or respective families..
the third party here, might not know what is this couple's real issue,
and will resort on one of the better half's complaint...
though this is not wise, do the third party has any choise......
well they can choose to ignore,
or symphatise the involved person,
or give advice..or support them.

with all these, the couple grabs the third parties point of view,
they didnt realise that what is needed is straightening the issue by
being able to comminicate well, and not assuming on the other person's reaction.

When these couple meet, they react coldly to each other,
even further damaging the relationship,
another reason for a the huge arguement...

when they argue, all sorts off things comes out to surface,
usually things that could have been talked out quitely without getting angry.
then when the whole arguement ends, they'll try to find where it went wrong.
and usually tries to gey someone to blame, either themselves,
or the surrounding, or their friends or familiy.

somebody will be blamed, but, the real truth is everyone played their role
in the incident.
 They'll keep blaming each other, as they fail to learn why such a thing occured in the first place.

This thing doesn't just stops with this couple but also the people surrounding them.
then the cycle grows, and grows and grows....

Tedious???

well everything that seems simple is complex,
and everything that seems complex is just plain simple....

the wise survives in such matters, as not to let it gain control over their
thoughts and feelings...
they analyse, and read through....
not judge it...

so who is really to be blamed???

nobody and everybody at the same time....

Think about it,
we'll be more forgiving and understanding to others,
and also wiser.

they might assume you to be hypocritical..
but its your choice to choose to look at the bigger picture..

as no path is wrong nor right...
unless the intention is malicious..

to avoid... might not be easy,
but to protect and to understand..
its simple...

listen to what people say, and dont assume their thoughts
as we are not them and they are not us...
minds differ... though soul doesn't.
peace! ;)